The New Floodgates of the Mind

It’s nerves.

Obviously, it’s nerves.

I wake up every morning and regardless of how I slept, my brain immediately gets bombarded by all the activities I have to do and see coming up in the future.

Just as a quick example of what went through my head this morning:

– Have to confirm something with the bank
– Have to confirm the review with the Real Estate Agent
– Have to set up a meeting with my Lawyer
– Have to get Comicopia in the mail
– Have to leave early Friday to pick up the kids
– Gymnastics for Melyssa and Beavers for both of them on Saturday
– Possibly drive kids back early on Sunday night
– May 1st tentatively set as signing date at Notary
– May 3rd weekend might begin moving in! Otherwise, May 9th weekend
– May 7th is the Standard Life Commercial Casting Audition
– May 14th is my birthday – might be moving!
– May 16th weekend moving offices from Rene Levesque and Guy to Stanley
– May 22nd is my LOMA 290 exam

etc etc etc.

It’s no wonder I’m a bundle of nerves and wake up feeling sick. Oy. I need a vacation!

why? why do I feel ill AGAIN this morning??

bleah.

nothing like waking up queasy and feeling sick for hours every morning… already 3 hours now…

i could fall back asleep with little difficulty. that’s for sure.

The Search for Coffee

So, lunchtime rolls around and I feel lost. I’m still so “out there” that I can’t make a decision on what I want to do. I finally decide to grab a pen and a pad of paper and make my way to A.L. Van Houtte downstairs. Won’t bother with the jacket even if it’s raining since it’s just two steps away.

I dash across the building and find it closed. Rats. Dash back and climb back up to my desk to get my jacket and umbrella. I leave again and decide to head for the new Starbucks at the Faubourg. Full. Rats. Keep moving to the Second Cup at the corner of Guy and St. Catherine’s. Full. Rats.

Finally decide on Tim Horton’s but realize it’ll probably be full with Concordia students. Decide to risk it.

Get to Timmie’s and manage to get the last available seat. Sadly, it’s near the cash register and thus near the smoking room. Within 10 minutes, I stink of smoke and am fed up of having to hear students complaining about classes and marks as well as having a constant line-up waiting to get their orders. Bah.

Get out and walk back to work in the rain. At least it’s quiet. I get to my desk feeling more bleah than ever. But, at least my coffee’s really good. mmm. French Vanilla. mmmm.

I struggle with my Roll-Up-The-Rim-To-Win cup… but don’t win anything. Oh well. The last time I won a cookie, it ended up making me ill. So I shouldn’t complain 🙂

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Thoughts for the day:

“To love is to place our happiness in the happiness of another”
– G. W. Von Leibnicz

“Amare è mettere la nostra felicità nella fellicità di un altro”
– G. W. Von Leibnicz

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“Time can never destroy what affection has built”
– Anonymous

“Il temp non potrà mai distruggere ciò che l’affetro ha costruito.”
– Anonimo

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“Words are eternal: when spaking them or writing them, be aware of their eternity”
– Anonymous

“Le parole sono eterne: pronunciandole, scrivendole, sii consapevole della loro eternità”
– Anonimo

I didn’t sleep a wink last night. I don’t believe it had anything to do with the massive amount of food that was ingested at the 2 family BBQs. After all, we got to bed at around midnight, which was at least 5 hours after our last meal!

But, there I was, tossing and turning, watching the minutes and hours click by horribly slowly…

This morning was excruciating to get up. ack. Worse of all, I felt queasy and nauseous and just plain ill. I’m still a little that way, but I seem to have found a bit of an appetite again. Only problem with that is that I have no food or money for food right now. Which means… I don’t know. Worst part is that I didn’t bring my book along today as I didn’t expect to be alone for lunch. So now, although I can go grab a coffee at the AL Van Houtte, I don’t have anything to read. What? Work on Comicopia 77? Before 76 is even mailed out? … orf. don’t have the energy. … I could go get myself another second-hand book cheaply… but that takes money. eek. this is a vicious cycle! 🙁

Considering I’m really not too accustomed to being at work on Easter Monday, the morning has zoomed by. 4 hours just like that. Wow. Still a lot more to go through before we can go home… and continue our packing 🙂

Yes, we visited the house again last night. sigh. It’s going to be a little bizarre, but we’re gonna be the only ones living on that street for a while. 🙂

oh well…

Got about 15 regular-size boxes and 10 small-size boxes packed already. Mainly books, cds, and videos. Isn’t that totally insane?

It’s a bizarre and scary feeling. And some sadness with the gladness. I can’t believe it’s really real. Although I’ll be leaving both the bad and the good behind when I move, the truth is that the good outweighs the bad. Chantale and I really have made this apartment a home in the last few years so it is a little sad to be leaving. But, we’re moving into a house. Our house. And it won’t be long before that house feels like a home. (heck, as I’ve mentioned before, it feels that way already and we haven’t even moved in yet! 🙂 )

It’s almost midnight. I’m tired. We just watched Austin Powers in Goldmember as a winding-down from the packing. It was a lot more fun watching it with her than when I watched it alone back in January 🙂

G’night everyone. Sweet dreams.

– Melyssa was released so she’s back at home.

– All paperwork is off to the Notary who will call to confirm which day we go in to sign.

– We’ve started collecting and packing boxes but, so far, only 5 boxes are packed and that with only a small portion of our video collection. eek.

– Chantale is still in bed. I got up early (8am on a holiday IS early!) so I can work on Comicopia and email all the delinquent members 🙂 Yes, it’s looking like a thin issue. C’est la vie.

– Plans for today consist of relaxing as well as taking another trip to the house with a digital camera 🙂 Also want to head over to Pier One with my mom and pick up some more candles.

But, it IS a holiday weekend, and outside of the formality of beginning to pack, it is going to be a “lazy” and relaxing weekend 🙂 Tomorrow afternoon (more than likely) we’ll drive my dad to see the house (along with anyone else who wants to come!). Easter Sunday is going to be spent EATING. Yup. BBQ with my parents for lunch, BBQ with my in-laws for supper 🙂

And now, back to Comicopia 🙂 Ciao!

i’m drained energy-wise. i’m not tired, i’m more listless. matches the weird flux in weather temperature i guess…

Chantale and I had a really nice night last night. I prepared supper so when she got home, she was greeted to a the delicious aromas of a home-cooked meal, intermingled with the scented candles in the living room, kitchen, and bathroom. I kissed her hello while music played in the background and then led her to the voicemail system and made her hear the message from our agent at the bank: The CHMC approved our purchase, and the Bank approved our mortgage. The house will be ours!!! 🙂

After a scrumptious supper, we headed to the ReMax office in Ile Perrot to pick up some more papers and then, since we were in the area, we drove to the house and just admired it. We walked around, pictured what we’d do, and ended it off by standing by the road looking up at it, listening to the sounds of the night “life” around us. Peaceful. Warm. A beautiful moment. Just holding each other and “soaking it all up” 🙂

Eventually, we got back into the car and drove around the other roads to see our “neighbors” before heading back in the direction of home… and realizing how bizarre it is to have a newly-built house already feeling like home…

Also, I did stop in to see Melyssa this morning before going to work. She’s still there but they’re trying her off the oxygen mask for a bit to see what happens. I’m hoping she’ll be home tonight. At least she’s always in good spirits.

Well, I’m home now. Left work at noon to go spend the next couple of hours at Saint Justin Hospital with Melyssa. She was in good spirits and we passed the time together drawing pictures and learning words on her magic sketching pad. It was a nice break from the realities of life to just be able to spend some one-on-one time with my daughter. I could tell she had a blast with all the “I Love You, Daddy”s thrown my way 🙂

Sweet little pumpkin, after her ventolin dosages at 3pm, she fell asleep shortly thereafter. I left her at about 3:35pm sleeping soundly and peacefully…

On the “House” Front, things are progressing along nicely! All documentations are pretty much almost complete. Picking up some more tonight, signing some more on Thursday night, and within the next week or so, we may be making some final signatures…. which means… oh.my.GOD… 🙂

More later.

you have to be amazed at humankind’s ability to live as a ping-pong ball.

all weekend, going crazy inside with excitement over the prospect of owning a home.

all monday morning, going crazy with waiting for news.

all monday afternoon, going crazy with glee at getting the news.

all monday evening, going nuts with trying to work out all the paperwork and worrying about what the bank did/could do to us.

all this morning, still going nuts over the necessary paperwork and funds.

and now, all beat up and exhausted, i get the news that Melyssa had to be admitted to Saint Justine’s last night and will probably be there for a few days because of asthma. she’s been on the oxygen mask since last night and her oxygen-blood-flow still isn’t at a reasonable level. crap.

my head feels like it’s just going to explode and then implode…