Ok, I went ahead and did this. 🙂 The URL is: http://www.wtv-zone.com/LadyBoheme/dearsanta.html
Dear Santa,
I have been a good boy.
It really wasn’t my fault what happened at Chantale’s Christmas party. It was Francisco who spiked the punch with too much B-52. I can’t help it if I drank 64 glasses. It was so good—smelled and tasted just like Apple Pie.
I thought it was funny when I put Jeff’s pants on my head and danced the Macarena on the Futon while singing `All I Want To Do’. I didn’t mean to break Chantale’s Palm Pilot and don’t know why Chantale would sue me for Breaking and Entering.
I don’t remember calling Al’s wife a Delicious cow—even though she looked like one with red eye shadow and blue lipstick!
And when I threw up on Wendy’s husband’s thigh, it was only because I ate too much of that pizza.
After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my motorcycle through my neighbor’s bathroom. I don’t think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a bogus snake and have me arrested for Assault & Battery!
So, Santa…here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all juicy and slick. And I’m really not to blame for any of this monstrous stuff. Please bring me what I want the most—bail money!
Sincerely and very yours,
Mike (Really a nice boy!)
P.S. It’s only 69 bucks!